A Treatise on the Hash

 

     by Jon C. Strauss

     Updated 9/1/99

  

 

   The Hash House Harriers(H**3) is an international running club(actually a drinking [legal beverages only, of course!] club that runs) with chapters all over the world(including LA and Long Beach, see for example <http://socal.hash.org/>). The organization was started by British officers in Malaysia in the 1930s to help while away their lonely off-duty hours in the jungle. It was named after the bar(the Hash House) where they gathered to recount the highlights of the runs. These origins are still honored both in the conduct of modern hashing and with an annual international hash, typically somewhere in Southeast Asia.

 

   Early on, the founders developed a style, and rules, for hashing that survive to this day. Basically, hashing is not racing and there is little honor in being first. In fact, hashers that habitually run in front of the pack are referred to derisively as FRBs(Front Running Bastards) and anyone with the temerity to short cut a trail is referred to, here sometimes honorifically, as an SCB(Short Cutting Bastard.) Hashing is closer to orienteering except there is a well marked trail that everyone, except possibly the SCBs, follows. The closest analogy might be a hare and hounds chase. Here, the objective is for the hare to lead the hounds(pack of runners or hashers) over an interesting and demanding course. Because the course typically breaks every quarter to half mile without an obvious restart point, however, runners of very different abilities will basically all run more or less together.

 

 How It Works

   Typically, the designated hare for the particular hash will lay out the course in advance marking it every 100 feet or so with splotches of flour or chalked arrows. Lampblack, food coloring, or ribbons can be used in snow, but that shouldn't be a common problem here in Southern California. The course over-all should be about 5 miles and hashes typically take about an hour. Every quarter mile or so the marked course ends either with the mark of an "X"(Check) or by doubling back on itself (Circle Check). As the hashers run along the course, it is considered good hash etiquette to yell out ON ON! upon observing a mark and CHECK! upon reaching a Check. When they reach a Check, the front runners, and subsequently everyone else, take off in all directions looking for a trail to resume with regular marks - while so doing, it is considered good hashing etiquette to yell out LOOKING! periodically. Now, when the trail is found, the fortunate hasher proceeds to follow it yelling out ON ON! as before, but most such trails will go for several hundred yards or so to end with an  "F" for False or just peter out for an Implicit False. Whereupon, the hapless hasher will yell out FALSE! and retrace his/her steps back to the Check to resume searching for the true trail. (By now, the basis for the rule: "The silent hasher runs alone!" should be obvious.) A clever hare can lay five or more of these false trails from each Check, all of which will be followed to their frustrating conclusions before the true trail is found; at which point the process repeats.

 

   In addition to laying clever falses, the objective is to make the course interesting. Trails, across tidal estuaries, streams, and fences, through forests, culverts, and canyons, and over bridges, cliffs, scree slopes, and other obstacles are de rigueur. Trails, however, should not be too illegal or impossibly dangerous and poison oak is to be avoided.

 

    Most runs end up where they start, but point to point runs are encouraged if return transportation can be provided. Return by train or bus can be well received, but it is a little tricky to schedule. Hash runs are typically held on Saturday or Sunday afternoons during the winter and Monday evenings when light permits. Special runs such as a Halloween Hash in full costume are encouraged.

 

    Hash runs can also be done with a "live" hare with a fifteen or twenty minute head start. This tends, however, to encourage an all out race to catch the hare.

 

   Most Hashes have a HashHorn who blows a bugle to signify that the pack, or he/she at least, is on the trail. Some Hashes have a whole array of other officers such as a HashMaster, a HashScribe, a HashChaplain, a HashHarlot, etc.

 

   Hashers are awarded hash names based on their most notable characteristics or exploits. My hash name from the LA Hash, for example, was “Commando” to reflect my predilection to take off across country and the Worcester Hash named me "Commander" to reflect my proclivity (certainly not my ability!) to be out front. The LA Hash named Jean "Chainlink" in recognition of the seventeen chainlink fences they had to climb on her maiden hash. They subsequently renamed her "Freeway" after she shortcut across the Pasadena Freeway during rush hour.

 

   Following the Hash, the hare provides liquid refreshments (legal!) and salty snacks at the ON IN where the Hash toasts the hare and new hashers and has been known to sing off-color dittys. The Hash can then retire to a suitable location such as the hare's house for post hash socializing. On particularly warm days, the hare may choose to serve liquids at some intermediate point on the hash trail - a Liquid Check. Different hashers volunteer as hares for successive hashes.

 

 Hash Rules

          1. There are no rules, except possibly:

          2. Checks should be no further than a quarter mile apart.

          3. False trails should be no more than an eigth mile long.

          4. The silent hasher runs alone.

          5. The Hash is not a race.

          6. Hash names should not be too off-color.

          7. Hash runs shouldn't be too long.

8. Hares are not to be physically abused, no matter how much the provocation through their violation of the above rules. Verbal abuse, however, is encouraged!

 

   If one, or all, of these rules appears to be violated, the concerned party should be referred to Rule #1.

 

 General

   Hashing can be a lot of fun, but you can't take it too seriously!